Zac and Siah (Part 3) / by Jeffrey Lo

June 23 2018 - Zac and Siah Part 3.jpg

ZAC AND SIAH (Part 3)
(DOWNLOAD PDF HERE)

ZAC and SIAH after the crucifixion of Jesus.

SIAH

There was this moment, though, when he was hanging up there and it, like, really hit me… 

He’s going to die.

And I know that’s the whole point of a crucifixion, to kill someone. 

And I know that’s what he claims to have wanted.

But after he had to carry the cross up the hill like that… And all the screaming at him and the throwing rotten food at him… I just thought there might be a point where we’d all stop and go enough is enough!

You know?

 

                                                                                    ZAC breaks down into tears.

 

                                                                        SIAH(cont’d)

Hey, Zac are you - ?

Zac…

 

                                                                        ZAC

shitshitshit…

 

SIAH approaches ZAC to comfort him.

 

                                                                        SIAH

Hey man, I know your feeling… -

 

                                                                        ZAC

Damn him!

 

                                                                        SIAH

That was tough to watch…

 

                                                                        ZAC

Why did he have to do that?

 

                                                                        SIAH

Why’d he have to get crucified?

To forgive our sins, I guess…

I mean that’s what he told us again and again.

And again.

 

                                                                        ZAC

Whose sins?

 

                                                                        SIAH

All of our sins.

 

                                                                        ZAC

So to erase all of the bullshit that has ever happened in HISTORY?

 

                                                                        SIAH

I guess so, yeah.

 

                                                                        ZAC

Really?

 

                                                                        SIAH

You know how J Christ gets man. When he gets on a roll he just starts… saying shit. I think he meant it as a nice gesture for, um, all of us.

 

                                                                        ZAC

Ok, fine. But why THAT?  Was that really the only option? That was the only sin eraser he had in his back pocket? In order to metaphoricallyforgive us for our sins, Jesus had to hang himself on a cross and die? Couldn’t he just, I don’t know, stop at getting stoned? 

 

                                                                                    A brief silence.

                                                                                    Beat.

                                                                                    SIAH bursts into laughter.

 

                                                                        ZAC

What are you laughing about?

 

SIAH works real hard to not laugh. He is not successful.

 

                                                                        SIAH

Sorrysorrysorry.

 

                                                                        ZAC

Josiah!

 

                                                                        SIAH

I’m sorry!

 

                                                                        ZAC

What’s so funny?

 

                                                                        SIAH

It’s just…

I started thinking about...

                                                            (Pause)

I shouldn’t be laughing.

 

SIAH stops laughing for a half second then bursts out laughing.

 

                                                                        ZAC

I swear to God Siah, if you don’t tell me why you’re laughing I’m going to –

 

                                                                        SIAH
Crucify yourself?

 

                                                                                    Beat.

 

                                                                        SIAH

That wasn’t funny.

 

                                                                        ZAC

Too soon.

 

                                                                        SIAH

Definitely too soon…

My bad.

                                                            (Beat)

Ok, so like, as you were talking I just started thinking about…

Heh.

Remember the first time J told us?

 

                                                                                    Pause.

                                                                                    ZAC lets a small smirk

 

                                                                        ZAC

Yeah.

 

                                                                        SIAH

Jesus calls that meeting just outside of Caesarea. I don’t even remember what it was for.

 

                                                                        ZAC

A pep talk probably.

 

                                                                        SIAH

Well J’s pep talk quickly escalates to a pep rally. 

And then he really gets going –

 

                                                                                    SIAH starts to imitate Jesus.

                                                                                    ZAC mimics the crowd.

 

                                                                        SIAH

We’re going to love our neighbors!

 

                                                                        ZAC

Yeeeeeeah!

 

                                                                        SIAH

Cause we need to treat our neighbors the way we want to be treated!

 

                                                                        ZAC

Free love!!!!

 

                                                                        SIAH

We’re going to take all of the money from the rich!

 

                                                                        ZAC

Yeaaaaah!

 

                                                                        SIAH

And we’re gonna give it to the poor!

 

                                                                        ZAC

That’s us!!!

 

                                                                        SIAH

                                                            (With a slight shift in gravity:)

And I know I’m among people from all walks of life.

I am among thieves.

I am among prostitutes.

I am among sinners.

For we are all sinners.

I am among the people that the world’s systems have beaten down

And I am here to say that you are my brothers and sisters.

Each and every one of you.

Is my brother and my sister.

That’s right.

Man, woman, anything in between it doesn’t matter.

You are my brother.

You are my sister.

You are whatever you want to be with me.

 

                                                                        ZAC

                                                            (Getting into it now, as a fangirl:)

I love you Jesus!!!

 

                                                                        SIAH

                                                            (Pointing at ZAC:)

AND I LOVE YOU TOO!

                                                            (As Jesus, takes a deep breath:)
We live in a world of hatred, and inequality.

We live in a world that has pushed us to become people we do not want to be.

And I am here to tell you that I am here to save you all.

 

                                                                        ZAC

WOOOO!

 

                                                                        SIAH

I am here to take all of your sins and get them forgiven.

That’s right.

I am here to take all of your sins from your souls and put them in mine.

Because that is how much I love you.

And that is how much I believe in you.

 

                                                                        ZAC

                                                            (As himself:)

It was honestly a hell of a speech.

 

                                                                        SIAH

And do you want to know how I’m going to do that?

How I’m going to forgive your sins?

I am going to Jerusalem.

I am going to be betrayed.

And I am going to be crucified.

                                                            (As himself:)

And as soon as he said that, Peter was like –

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!?

 

                                                                                    SIAH bursts into laughter.

                                                                                    ZAC can’t help himself and is

laughing too.

 

                                                                        SIAH

We thought he was insane!

 

                                                                        ZAC

I mean, he kind of is, right?

Who says something like that?

 

                                                                        SIAH

Um. J Dot Christ does.

 

                                                                        ZAC                                                                

We all tried to shut that shit down but he was having none of it.

 

                                                                        SIAH

And then as if that wasn’t enough – he doubles down on it –

 

                                                                        ZAC

                                                            (Now taking on the role of Jesus:)

But don’t worry everyone.

I will die, yes. I will die on that cross.

For I am just man.

But don’t you worry. 

I will rise.

 

                                                                        SIAH

                                                            (As the crowd:)

Huh?

 

                                                                        ZAC

To prove to you all that these sins have been forgiven.

On the third day…

I will rise again…

 

                                                                                    SIAH, as the crowd, gasps.

                                                                                    ZAC laughs.

 

                                                                        SIAH

And Peter’s sitting in the back muttering – are you serious right now Jesus? You are going to come back to life? And I heard Mary Magdalene whispering, who do you think you are?

 

                                                                        ZAC

I will rise…

                                                            (Pause, then with dramatic flair:)

From the dead.

 

                                                                        SIAH

And I’m just sitting in the back while Peter, Matt and Mary are losing their minds thinking – WHY ARE YOU SAYING THIS!? I mean, I know we’ve pulled off some crazy tricks before but this is some real shit! Hiding fish and bread and putting them into empty baskets for a million people – easy. Turning the water into wine, kind of complicated slight of hand but we figured it out.

 

                                                                        ZAC

That one was tough.

 

                                                                        SIAH

But I was like – RISING FROM THE DEAD?

That is real life!

We cannot help him with –

 

                                                                                    SIAH suddenly stops.

                                                                                    Beat.

 

                                                                        SIAH

Oh shit…

 

                                                                        ZAC

What?

 

                                                                        SIAH
Oh no…

 

                                                                        ZAC

Siah, what?

 

                                                                        SIAH

Zac…

I…

Oh god.

 

                                                                        ZAC

SIAH!

 

                                                                        SIAH

We need to help Jesus rise from the dead.

END OF PLAY.